Every parent, without an exception, wants his/her child to be happy and healthy…and successful in life.  What then, is wrong with our generations.  Some say it’s fine the way it is.  Others say it’s wrong but don’t know what to do about it – so they go with the flow.  This is a reflection of irresponsibility and ignorance.  What is the yardstick?  Where does parenting begin and end?  How do you measure a child’s success in life?

First step of successful parenting is to take information from right sources.  From authorities.  It is important to understand the fundamentals of life, the relationships within and the framework to operate.  Knowledge starts with acceptance that we are not the body.  We are residents of this human form of body.  And we are responsible for our own actions and reactions in life.

Keeping this central reality in mind, let’s see how we can transform our understanding of parenting and the needs of a child.  It is the primary duty of the father and mother to lead the child into a proper understanding of the values of life, till the time he is grown up enough to execute the duties of life properly.  But the issue is that most of us forget that death is a reality that can strike at any time in life and we cannot help anyone at the time of death or thereafter.  So how do we empower a child to live through the material maze…and successfully so?

For this, the goal of the human life has to be well-defined and embedded in the parent’s mind very firmly.  Every parent desires the welfare of the child. And the greatest welfare is to understand and acknowledge the truth that, the child should no more undergo the repetition of birth and death and the inherent material pangs.  The parent should educate himself and the child in such a way they are convinced that they need to work towards spiritual advancement.  Feeding a child’s belly sumptuously is not going to save him from cycle of death

Now-a-days we see many parents handing over huge amounts of pocket money and make elaborate arrangements for the child to be taken care of.  But it is the duty of the parent to personally ensure good care and spiritual training so that children may not fall down to abominable lifestyles.  Therefore Bhāgavata says, pitā na sa syāt…na mocayed yaḥ samupeta-mṛtyum: “One should not become mother, one should not become father, if he cannot release his children from the clutches of death.”   And how one can be saved from the clutches of death?  Their consciousness must be trained to think of hearing about and practicing the right consciousness.  The parent is directly responsible for the child’s demeanor.  Like Srila Prabhupada says, “If you give a sharpened razor in the hands of a child, the child will cut here and there. So who is responsible: the parent or the child?”

Many complain that their children are very mischievous and they are forced to adopt disciplinary methods.  A child by nature is playful and mischievous too.  But unless parents engage the child in better and higher engagements, he cannot be uplifted.  No one can be motionless, actionless or desireless.  It is the dovetailing of these intrinsic qualities into spiritual realms that will help them streamline their children’s energies and gradually fortify their consciousness.

Raising children is a great responsibility, and a prospective parent should be convinced that he can deliver his child from the clutches of birth, death, disease and old age.

This can happen only with development of spiritual consciousness.

References
Bhagavad-gita as it is, lecture 7.11-12 — Bombay, February 25, 1974

Morning Walk Conversation — September 28, 1972, Los Angeles

Room Conversation with Mr. Deshimaru — June 13, 1974, Paris

Morning Walk and Room Conversation — August 9, 1976, Tehran

Letter to: Koumadaki — Australia March 27, 1972